


Thoughts and drabbles

by DrunkSmoochum



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Other, just me rambling, rebecca and seb are mentioned/can perhaps show up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-07-12 18:01:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16000460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrunkSmoochum/pseuds/DrunkSmoochum
Summary: These are just a few drabbles I wrote for different situations taking place in Emmerdale (evolving around Robron).I posted the first two on my tumblr before, any others will be posted here immediately.





	1. The passport

**Author's Note:**

> So this first drabble I wrote when spoilers came out that Lydia would find Rebecca's memory book.
> 
> Mentions of Rebecca and Seb.

‘’Vic, what’s so important that you couldn’t tell me through the phone?’’ Robert said as he walked passed Vic towards the living room of her house.

As he looked at her, he noticed his sister had a very worried look on her face.

‘’I… I was cleaning Rebecca’s room and I found this.’’ Vic grabbed a little booklet from the back pocket of her jeans.

It wasn’t until Robert took a closer look at it that he realised what it was. ‘’Is that what I think it is?’’ He took it from Vic and opened it, confirming what he thought.

Vic looked as she was about to start crying. ‘’Rob, she couldn’t have left the country without it.’’ The worried in her voice was clear. ‘’ What if something happened to her? What if someone took her and we just assumed that she was okay all this time?’’

‘’I knew something was off, I just thought it had to do with the injury, but I..’’ Robert said partially to himself and to Vic. ‘’Have you told anyone about this?’’ he looked at his sister.

The worried look on Vic’s face turned into a confused one. ‘’ What? No you’re the first person I told, but Rob we have to call the police.’’

Robert shook his head. ‘’No, you can’t tell anyone about this, Vic.’’

‘’Rob, if something has happened to her the police need to know so they can-‘’

‘’ I know.’’ Robert said, cutting off his sister. ‘’ But I need to do my own research first. Vic this is a small town, the chances of her being taken by someone from outside the village is minimal, not to mention that only a small amount of people knew she had friends in Ibiza.’’

Vic looked at Robert. ‘’ You mean.. someone we know could have had Rebecca all this time?’’

Robert nodded. ‘’ I think so.., but I need to make sure. So, until then you can’t tell anyone. Not Diane, not Lachlan and not the police. Promise me you won’t tell anyone until I say so.’’ He looked stern at his sister.

Vic nodded. ‘’I promise.’’

**

Robert was walking through town, the passport in his jacket. He needed to find out more about Rebecca’s disappearance. Luckily for him he saw the one person that probably saw Rebecca for the last time before her ‘trip to Ibiza’.

‘’Ross!’’ Robert walked up to Ross.

‘’What do you want Sugden?’’ Ross replied annoyed as he kept on walking.

‘’I wanted to ask you about Rebecca.’’ Robert went to walk next to Ross.

Ross stopped. ‘’ What about her.’’ He said with a sigh.

‘’ Well did she mention going to Ibiza before? Or was this just a spur of the moment thing?’’ Robert looked at him.

‘’Who cares?’’ Ross replied even more annoyed, trying to hide the hurt in his voice.

‘’Well I care, she is Seb’s mum, I just can’t believe that she would leave him like that.’’

Ross sighed. ‘’ I hadn’t heard about any plans to go to Ibiza, not until she mentioned it when Lachlan went off on her.’’

Robert looked confused. ‘’what do you mean Lachlan went off on her?’’

‘’He was going off on what kind of mother she was and how she just dumped Seb with you. She then told him that if she wanted to be away from Seb that she would have taken up her mates offer and go to Ibiza to help with a bar. Guess that exactly what she did.’’ Ross looked sad for a moment.

‘’Why was Lachlan upset that she left Seb with me?’’ Robert asked confused.

‘’I don’t know okay.’’ Ross rolled his eyes. ‘’ I don’t have time for this.’’ He walked away angry leaving Robert behind.

**

As Robert walked towards the mill, it all started to dawn in on him that Lachlan could be a possible suspect in Rebecca’s disappearance.

But how could he be? She was the only family, next to Seb, he had left. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. He knew Lachlan had a darker side, but he would never has guessed that he would do something like this and if he did, why would he do something like this? What reason would there have been to possibly kidnap Rebecca?

Robert’s thoughts were interrupted by a voice.

‘’Robert?’’ Lydia walked up to Robert. ‘’Have you heard anything from Rebecca yet?’’

He looked at her. ’’Uh no, still nothing.’’

‘’Oh, poor Seb, I can’t believe she would just leave that beautiful boy behind.’’ She looked apologetic.

Robert nodded. ‘’ Well that makes two of us.’’

‘’Maybe I’m sticking my nose in, but I found her memory book in the boot of Lachlan’s car, it just seems weird that she would leave that behind as well, you know seeing as it helped her with her recovery, you know?’’

Robert looked confused at Lydia. ‘’ Did he tell you how it got there?’’

**

Robert thought about everything he had heard and compiled a plausible story on who pretended to be Rebecca and why, but how was he going to proof it? Who would believe him? No, he was sure. Well not completely sure, but sure enough that Lachlan has been up to something.

Aaron and liv walked into the mill with their grocery bags. They were laughing about something. It was Aaron who noticed Robert pacing around. ‘’Everything okay?’’ Aaron asked.

Robert stopped and looked at them. ‘’I need to tell you guys something. It’s best if you sit down.’’

Aaron and Liv looked at each other and did what Robert asked them to do. ‘’If this is about the wedding and you having second thoughts...’’ Aaron said looking worried.

‘’What? No, no this isn’t about our wedding.’’ Robert said immediately, walking over to them. ‘’ It’s about Rebecca... and Lachlan.’’


	2. Robert's stag do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This drabble is about Robert's stag do. It is kind of angsty.

Robert wanted to walk away and punch a wall or something. Anything that would have made him kept his mouth shut, but he was sat in between Vic and Diane with no room to escape.

Why did she have to go on about his dad during his stag do. He was really enjoying himself and didn’t even think about his dad, in fact he hadn’t thought about his dad for a while now.

_Oh Robert, your dad would have been so proud of you._

‘’Just shut up will you!’’

Robert knew he should not have gone off at Diane, she was only being nice after all, but she had mentioned it so many times before bringing his mood down. Of course, most times Aaron was there coming up with a distraction from the conversation, unfortunately for Robert he wasn’t here this time.

Vic and Diane were looking baffled at Robert and his sudden outburst. He sighed and finished his beer, motioning that he wanted to get another one.

Diane stood up, nervously. ‘’I’ll get you one, Love.’’ she said quietly knowing she had upset him. She walked towards the bar ordering another beer.

‘’What’s all that about then?’’ Vic asked. ‘’ Diane was just saying...’’

Robert cut his sister off. ‘’I know what she was saying Vic, she was saying the same shit she always says.’’ He said annoyed rolling his eyes.

‘’Oi, she just wants to be nice, no need to yell at her for it.’’ Vic said cross with her brother.

Robert closed his eyes, took a deep breath and let it go. Calming himself. ‘’I know and it’s not her fault it’s just...’’ he paused. Robert knew he should just tell her, get it over with, but how does one tell their sister that their father wasn’t the man she thought he was.

‘’Dad knew.’’ Robert said quietly.

Vic looked at him confused. ‘’What do you mean dad knew?’’

He sighed and spoke up louder. ‘’ Dad knew I liked men okay. He caught me with a farmhand once.’’

His sister looked at him with widened eyes.

‘’He was angry with me. He couldn’t even look at me for weeks.’’ Robert continued leaving out some details of the event. ‘’So, every time Diane mentions how proud dad would have been of me I... I die a little inside because I know he thought me to be his biggest disappointment.’’ Robert said upset.

‘’Oh pet.’’ Diane had returned with the beer for Robert, she had heard the whole conversation. She had a sad look upon her face.

Great, this wasn’t what Robert had wanted at all. ‘’I’m sorry.’’ He sighed and walked off. He went outside clearing his head. He wondered what Aaron was up to, surely, he was having a much better time at his stag do than Robert was.

‘’Robert?’’

He turned around and looked at whoever called out his name.

It was Diane.

‘’I’m fine, just go back inside.’’ Robert said waving his hand.

‘’No, not until I have said what I want to say.’’ She replied walking up to him.

Robert sighed and rolled his eyes leaning against the wall.

‘’Look, I know Jack wasn’t an easy man and...’’ Diane took a deep breath. ‘’ And I know that he wasn’t always the best father, but I know that he cared a lot about you.’’

Robert just sighed, biting the inside of his cheek.

‘And I know that it probably doesn’t change anything what has happened between you two, but I need you to know that he cared.’’ Diane continued.

Robert nodded looking at Diane. ‘’Are you done now?’’

Diane looked back at him ‘’No, I am not, because Robert, **I** am proud of you.’’

Robert stopped leaning against the wall, turning towards Diane.

‘’ I know I don’t say it enough, but I am and that’s how I know your dad would have been too, but if it gives you that much grieve, I won’t mention it again.’’ Diane smiled faintly. ‘’Now I’m done.’’

Robert was touched by what Diane had to say. He wished he had said something before.

‘’Come here pet.’’ Diane hugged Robert.

He hugged her back saying nothing.

‘’Now let’s go back inside. Victoria had a surprise for you.’’ Diane said taking Robert back into the pub.

As Robert walked back into the pub he figured that nothing would make this night better, his mood had already dropped talking about his dad. Not to mention that he probably had to talk with Vic about it as well.

 It was then he saw Vic, Matty, Bernice, Kerry, Priya, Vanessa, Pete, Nicola and Jimmy on stage. All of them were dressed as Aaron.

Vic had a mic in her hand. ‘’ I know you probably wanted Aaron to be here, so we all decided to dress up for you and sing a little song.’’

Robert looked at them terrified. This was going to give him nightmares for sure. It wasn’t until he saw them perform the song ‘’Super trouper’’ he was starting to smile. Maybe this night was going to be fun again after all.

And it was. Robert was enjoying himself, albeit weirded out by all the ‘Aaron look-a-likes’. The best thing though? His dad wasn’t mentioned by Vic or Diane for the rest of the night.


	3. Ticklish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert finds out Aaron is ticklish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story takes place in 2015 during the affair area

Today was the third night that Aaron was staying over at Home Farm.

His mum had been texting him questioning his whereabouts and if she should expect him to sleep home tonight. He had sighed heavily and texted a quick reply telling her to mind her own business and that he was a grownup who knew what he was doing.

Did he know what he was doing though?

Here he was, naked under the covers, in the house of his lover, who lived here with his wife, step-son and father in law.

Chrissie had gone away for the week, taking Lawrence and Lachlan with her. Robert had somehow managed to convince her that he should stay behind in Emmerdale, even though they had just gotten married.

If you had told Aaron years ago that he would find himself in a situation like this he’d probably would have flipped you off and laughed in your face saying ‘’as if.’’

Yet, he did find himself in this situation, knowing that Robert loved him, yet he would never be offered more than this.

He was a _mistress_ and nothing more.

‘’You okay?’’

Aaron snapped out of his thoughts and looked at Robert who entered the bedroom in nothing more than just a towel around his hips. His hair was still wet from the shower he had just taken, and small droplets were dripping onto his shoulders, sliding down his torso.

‘’Just my mum doing my head in,’’ Aaron said, shaking the phone in his hand before putting it down on the nightstand left of him.

Robert nodded. He knew that if Chas had known that Aaron was here he would be in big trouble. He promised her to stay away from Aaron after all and he couldn’t risk her going to Chrissie.

‘’What did you tell her?’’ He asked him as he walked over to the dresser. He opened a drawer and grabbed himself some clean underwear.

Aaron sighed as he sat back against the headboard, the covers sliding down to his hips. ‘’That I’m a grownup and to mind her own business.’’

Robert smiled at the annoyance in Aaron’s voice. He dropped his towel and changed into his underwear. He looked towards Aaron and noticed the blue eyes that were piercing at his body.

‘’What?’’ Robert said with a smirk. He knew he had a great body.

Aaron shrugged. ‘’ Just wondering why you would put on underwear if I am gonna take it off of you anyways,’’ he replied moving on the bed. He sat on his knees on the edge of the bed, pulling Robert closer by the waistband of his underwear.

Robert grinned and leant down to kiss Aaron. His lover being confident and being in charge has always been a weak spot for Robert. It made him love Aaron even more, although he would never admit that to himself.

He moved his hands down Aaron’s body, placing featherlight touches, putting more pressure as he went down Aaron’s sides with his fingers. He noticed Aaron squirming a bit, making a sound like he was holding in a giggle.

It was the first time ever Robert noticed Aaron do this. He pulled away and asked him if everything was okay.

Aaron just nodded and pulled Robert back into a kiss. Robert moved forward, kneeling on the edge of the bed. His fingers trailing over Aaron’s sides again who then did the same thing as before, squirming and giggling.

It was then Robert realised what was going on. Aaron was ticklish.

How did he not know this before? Surely this had happened before. Was Robert too consumed by his own to ever notice?

As Robert pulled away once more, Aaron looked at him confused.

Did Aaron even know?

‘’Something wrong?’’

‘’You’re ticklish?’’ Robert responded, it sounded more like a statement then a question.

Aaron huffed. ‘’No, I’m not,’’ a shade of red appeared on his cheeks. Of course, he was ticklish, not that he would ever tell Robert. He could already imagine Robert teasing him about it. He actually thought he had kept it well hidden, Robert hadn’t mentioned it before after all.

Robert grinned as he noticed Aaron’s reaction. ‘’You so are,’’ he said.

‘’Shuddup.’’ Aaron replied a scowl appearing on his face. It made Robert grin even wider.

‘’Soooo if I were to do this…’’  Robert said placing his fingers on Aaron’s sides tickling him.

Aaron yelped as Roberts fingers came in contact with him. He started giggling loudly. ‘’Robert stop!’’

Robert did not stop. He was enjoying this, more than he probably should.

‘’Rob please stop, Robert!’’ Aaron begged. In his giggling fit he managed to push Robert backwards and off the bed.

Robert landed on his back with a thud. Aaron was still trying to catch his breath as he went to check up on him.

‘’What was that for?’’ Robert said annoyed, pushing himself up on his elbows.

‘’It’s your own fault, I told you to stop.’’ Aaron replied, his breathing returning to normal.

Robert huffed and sat up, wincing at his back.’’ I was just having some fun,’’ He looked at Aaron and smiled when he saw that the scowl on his face had returned.

‘’Yeah, well I can think of other things that are way more fun for me.’’ Aaron said, shrugging.

Robert nodded, moving closer to Aaron. ‘’How about this, you show me these things that you find way more fun to do and I promise I won’t tickle you again.’’ He smiled cheekily, crossing his fingers behind his back.

Robert felt like he had hit a goldmine now that he knew Aaron was ticklish.

Aaron looked at him, contemplating his offer. ‘’Deal.’’

Robert grinned as he stood up. ‘’Alright then, you’re the boss. What do you wanna do?’’

Robert played along to what Aaron wanted to do. A few hours and several orgasms later, when Aaron asked him if he wanted to go for another round and Robert told him he needed a minute, Aaron made the mistake of calling him old.

‘’What did you just say?’’ Robert said still breathing heavily.

Aaron smirked at him ‘’Deaf as well then? I’m not surprised at your age’’ He laughed.

Robert had a scowl on his face. ‘’ Oh, you’re going to pay for that.’’ He then climbed on top of Aaron and started tickling him.

Aaron was giggling again. ‘’Rob no! You promised to not do that again!’’ He couldn’t move much, being pinned down by Robert’s weight.

‘’What was that? I can’t hear you.’’  Robert replied grinning widely.

‘’Rob, please’’ Aaron begged him whilst giggling.

Aaron saying the magic word made him stop.

He scowled at Robert who just grinned back at him. He knew that Robert would break his promise, it wasn’t the first time it had happened after all. He pushed the thought away when he saw Robert look at him in the softest way he had ever seen.

‘’Kiss and make up?’’ Robert said smiling,

Aaron smiled back at him, unable to be mad at Robert for long. He had been screwed the moment he had laid eyes on Robert and even though Robert would not offer him more than this, he didn’t mind it one bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought of this when I saw this (http://isabellaofparma.tumblr.com/post/151770473496) amazing gifset of Aaron being ticklish.


	4. Mission Impossible aka Aaron had to go to the loo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Aaron was on his way back from the loo he encountered some trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote this after tonight's episode where Aaron went to the loo and never showed up in any of the scenes.
> 
> **mentions of Seb and Rebecca**

Aaron arrived at the hospital, carrying Seb on his arm. He asked for Rebecca’s room at the front desk explaining that he had her son and she would want to see him. The nurse behind the desk gave them the floor and room number.

‘’Okay little man, see if you can spot daddy for me,’’ Aaron said stepping out of the lift.

He was walking fast. In his hurry to get to the hospital Aaron didn’t had the chance to go to the bathroom before and he needed to go badly.

Aaron didn’t find Robert on the way to the room, but he did spot Diane at the coffee machine. He handed Seb to Diane and told her he needed to go to the loo.

He reached the loo and relieved himself quickly. As he stepped out of the bathroom he heard a familiar voice. He looked at the direction of the voice and recognised who it was from. Standing in the hallway where he needed to go was Alex. He was talking to some nurses.

Aaron cursed under his breath and stepped back into the bathroom. He wasn’t sure what to do. Part of him wanted to just walk past them, ignoring Alex like he was the plague, but he knew that Alex might start to talk to him, which he wasn’t in the mood for. Another part of him wanted to go for the confrontation, but he wanted to go back to Robert and Seb as soon as possible, which probably wouldn’t happen if he went for the confrontation.

He counted to ten and stepped out of the bathroom once more. Alex was still talking with a few nurses. Aaron rolled his eyes. He was seriously going to have to sneak his way back to Rebecca’s room.

Alex stood with his back towards Aaron, giving him a chance to walk by fast, but before he was able to, Alex turned around and walked towards his direction with a nurse.

Aaron hid behind a wall quickly, grabbing a magazine and held it in front of him. He couldn’t believe he was doing this, he must look like a total idiot.

Alex passed by Aaron who then slid past him still holding the magazine in front of him.

‘’Young man, that magazine belongs in the waiting area.’’ An old woman shouted after Aaron, causing the nurses and Alex to look at him. He cursed under his breath once more before slowly walking backwards and placing the magazine back where he got it from.

From everyone else’s perspectives it must have seem like Aaron had lost his mind or something. He was about to walk forwards when it happened.

‘’Aaron?’’

Aaron sighed and turned around. ‘’Hey..’’ he scratched his head, feeling like an idiot.

He watched as the confused look on Alex turned into a disappointed look. He must have figured out what Aaron was doing.

They stood there for a moment when saying nothing.

‘’I should..’’ Aaron pointed behind him.

Alex walked away from him.

‘’Right..’’ Aaron muttered under his breath. ‘’That could have gone better..’’

His phone started to buzz. It was Robert texting him where he was. He texted him back saying he was on his way only to realise he had actually never found Rebecca’s room before.

Aaron sighed. He should have gone to the bathroom at home.


	5. I am not mad, I am sad. There is a difference.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> my thoughts on what happened after yesterday's (nov 2nd 2018) episode.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote this angsty fic after yesterday's events.  
> There is a mentioning of self-harming so be warned.

He couldn't believe it, thought it to be some sick joke, that Robert at least would have had the decency to let Aaron say goodbye. But no, instead there he stood. Watching as Rebecca and Ross drove away with his step son in their car.

Holding back his tears, Aaron clenched his fist and turned around. Robert didn't look him in the eyes, didn't dare to.

So Aaron decided to leave. He shoved past Robert, ignoring the hand he reached out to make him stop.

"Aaron wait," Robert had said, following his husband. Aaron ignored him again and kept walking towards the Mill.

Once in the Mill Aaron grabbed his car keys and tried to walk out of the door again, only to be stopped by Robert.

"No, you are not leaving, not now. We need to talk about this." He stood infront of Aaron, closing off his way to the door.

Aaron scoffed. "You mean like how you talked to me about giving away our son?" He spat, anger dripping in his voice.

"He's her son too, Aaron." Robert replied.

Aaron clenched his jaw and nodded. "Right." He pushed past Robert who tried to grab onto him. Aaron shrugged him off and walked towards his car. "Don't bother looking for me, I need to be on my own." Aaron said as he got in the car.

Robert made a run for the passenger seat. "If you think that I will let you go on your own than..." but before he could open the door Aaron drove off, leaving Robert behind.

He drove, for what felt like hours, before stopping at a layby near the woods. For the first time in a while Aaron started crying.

In moments like these Aaron missed having his best friend around. Adam would have talked him through this, would have called Robert out on his shit.

Now he had no one else to go to. Vic was still mad at him, his mum and Paddy were still grieving his little sister and he didn't want to burden Liv, knowing she and Robert were finally good.

Aaron reached for his phone, only to realise he didn't  bring it with him. He cursed at himself slamming his fists on the steering wheel.

He looked at his hands, hurting from slamming them down hard. The thought of slamming his head on the steering wheel came to mind. He shaked the thought out if his head, no he couldn't let this get to him, not like this.

It had turned dark when Aaron walked into the Mill. He was greeted by a hug from Liv, one he accepted and returned.

"I was so worried." His younger sister said, sadness in her voice. " Don't you ever leave your phone behind again." The girl sobbed and Aaron sobbed with her. "I'm sorry."

Aaron decided to go to bed the moment he had talked to Liv. He was too exhausted for anything else, the day emotionally drained him.

It turns out that Robert had called everyone in the village once he realised that Aaron had left his phone. He heard Robert make a few phone calls to people exclaiming that Aaron had returned.

Robert later joined him in bed. "I'm sorry, I should have discussed it with you." He placed a hand on Aaron's shoulder, who for the first time in hours didn't shrugged him off.

He didn't respond to his husband.There were no more tears, just silence and numbness.

"I thought I lost you."

Aaron heard Robert stifle a sob behind him. He decided not to tell his husband about how close he was to doing something stupid.

Aaron was silent as he moved Robert's arms and hands, moving into the warmth of his husbands body. Letting himself be the small spoon and linking their fingers on Aaron's stomach.

It was a sign to Robert to let him know that he hadn't lost him. That Aaron wasn't mad anymore, that he was just sad. That he needed the warmth and comfort of his husband.

And that's how both drifted off to sleep, for tomorrow would be another day to talk.


End file.
